What Should Jon Corzine's Hedge Fund Be Named?

Tyler Durden's picture

Since over the past five years hedge funds are better known for coming up with ingenious names, than for actually outperforming the market (recall that "the aggregate hedge fund index is now significantly underperforming the S&P 500 (from both the top in 2007 and the lows in 2009"), we hereby wish to do the Honorable Jon Corzine a favor, and save him the money he would otherwise spend on an expensive naming consultant, by offering up the creative services of our audience in conjuring the name for his future hedge fund. So dear ZH readers, take it away, although keep in mind Long-Term Capital Vaporization LP appears to already have been taken by a patent troll (soon to be likely sued by YHOO).

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fuu's picture

DIAF

Doing It Again Fuckers

Concentrated power has always been the enemy of liberty.'s picture

Prostitutes Purse, LP

or

Gimme your money you fucking widow, LP

camaro68ss's picture

(MSF) Mupet sucker fund

Sign up today and get a 40% return by months end. We'll even throw in a spiderman towel absolutly FREE!

Stackers's picture

Deposits Only Capital Managment

El Viejo's picture

"Money Mine"  What's mine is mine and what's yours is mine.

Crisismode's picture

V.A.N.I.S.H.

 

Virtual

Anonymous

Naked-Shorting

Is

So

Hot

 

Dr. Engali's picture

The there is so many posts that I doubt this one will get noticed so I'm not even going to try fund.

redpill's picture

C.O.R.Z.I.N.E. Asset Management

 

Complete

Orifice

Raping of

Zealous

Investors

Never

Ends

BaBaBouy's picture

Perpetual Presidential Immunity Fund LLC...

bania's picture

Fahrenheit 451 Capital

BigJim's picture

AYMABTU

All Your Muppets Are Belong To Us

forexskin's picture

Black Knight Massacre Fund

BKMF

eatthebanksters's picture

Motherfucking Peregrine Global!

HoofHearted's picture

POOF

Only POOF, nothing else. All it signifies is that your money is gone. Doesn't stand for anything.

WorkingClassHero's picture

Paying Out Non-Zero Interset, So Come All Muppets 

greenEagles's picture

Rehypo-Distressed Segregated Master Fund LP

Citxmech's picture

How about:

Maelstrom Capitol;

Abyssal Investments;

Black Hole Equity;

Three-Card-Monty Inc.

Quicksand Partners;

Vapor Assets;

Sinkhole Group;

Hotel California Investors;

Muppet Management Co.; or

P.T. Barnum and Associates?

This is fun!

 

FEDbuster's picture

Shame On Me Investments (as in "fuck me once shame on you, fuck me twice shame on me")

francis_sawyer's picture

I'd just fucking call it 'Robot Trader' or 'Million Dollar Bonus'...

But that's just me...

A L I E N's picture

Rehypothecation Total Return Fund

Michael's picture

I'm voting for evil vs a cunt hair's less evil, I'm voting for Obama.

Michael's picture

Time is almost up. Complete and total worldwide economic collapse is on our door step.

The only thing we're doing right now is playing the political game. If you don't play you can't win, and the only way you can win is by changing the rules, which is what I am doing. Think Kobayashi Maru.

We're just paving a new path to possibly fix our country.

Temporalist's picture

Why not just call it MF Global again?  The muppets love repetition and things they recognize.

 

MFG - Muppet Fleecing Grinder

Michael's picture

OK, just fucking around with you.

I'm taking a 3 week vacation so you'll not hear my antagonistic mind for a while.

You'll have to think for yourselves.

See you in about three weeks, and that was just a psy-op test to see if your were paying attention.

You were.

GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

 

 

The end of the freakin road.

 

Welcome to Corzine's Island.

 

Strider52's picture

ROFL @ Quicksand Partners.

URZIZMINE's picture

Ticker FNK

(F)uct

(N)ot

(K)issed

THX 1178's picture

Or:

 

 

Phlim-Phlam

Our

Nitwit

Zilch

Investors

So

Come

Here

Everyone--

Muppets

Everywhere!

steve from virginia's picture

 

Too easy:

 

The Caveat Emptor Fund

Michael's picture

I'm voting for evil vs a cunt hair's less evil, I'm voting for Obama.

Vaiman's picture

BOFJ.A

Bend Over For Jon.  Again

misterb4096's picture

Okay so I have to ask (been reading for a year or so, first comment), where/how did the "Are belong to" verbiage come to be? First few times I saw it I thought we had an ESOL reader making a simple grammatical error, but I'm starting to feel that I'm missing something here...

GeezerGeek's picture

It came from a video game. According to Wikipedia "The text comes from the opening cutscene of the 1991 European Sega Mega Drive version of the video game Zero Wing[1] by Toaplan, which was poorly translated from Japanese."

The full text is "All your base are belong to us". You can search on that phrase in your browser for a more complete explanation. 

AustriAnnie's picture

+1

Not a day goes by when I don't learn something from ZH.

I thought "all your ____ are belong to us" was just something stupid AnAnonymous said in one of his tirades against American citizenism.

 

GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

 

Oh no.......it's totally real actually.

 

misterb4096's picture

Okay so I have to ask (been reading for a year or so, first comment), where/how did the "Are belong to" verbiage come to be? First few times I saw it I thought we had an ESOL reader making a simple grammatical error, but I'm starting to feel that I'm missing something here...

Citxmech's picture

There was an "Aliens Attack" type computer game (was it on the TRS-80?) in the old days that had the line:  "All your base are belong to us."