Why In America It Pays To Be An Old, White, Widowed, Native-Born Female; Everyone Else Is Out Of Luck

Tyler Durden's picture


As the 2012 presidential candidates prepare their closing arguments to America’s middle class, they are courting a group that has endured a lost decade for economic well-being. Since 2000, the middle class has shrunk in size, fallen backward in income and wealth, and shed some—but by no means all—of its characteristic faith in the future. These stark assessments are based on findings from a new nationally representative Pew Research Center "Fewer, Poorer, Gloomier" study and we present the only two charts that matter now.


Fully 85% of self-described middle-class adults say it is more difficult now than it was a decade ago for middle-class people to maintain their standard of living. Of those who feel this way, 62% say “a lot” of the blame lies with Congress, while 54% say the same about banks and financial institutions, 47% about large corporations, 44% about the Bush administration, 39% about foreign competition and 34% about the Obama administration. Just 8% blame the middle class itself a lot.


The Pew Research analysis finds that upper-income households accounted for 46% of U.S. aggregate household income in 2010, compared with 29% in 1970. Middle-income households claimed 45% of aggregate income in 2010, compared with 62% in 1970. Lower-income households had 9% of aggregate income in 2010 and 10% in 1970.


Even as the share of Americans in the middle has declined, the income status has improved for some demographic groups and deteriorated for others.




Source: Pew Research Center

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Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:26 | 2731174 malikai
malikai's picture

Stratification, bitchez!

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:27 | 2731179 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Native born? Indians?

I knew that casino money helped someone.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:36 | 2731219 economics9698
economics9698's picture

Transfer payments, divorce laws, and government in general favor women and old farts.  Children do not vote so they get fucked.


Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:51 | 2731288 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

Right.  Granny will be sure to show up early to vote for that handsome young man.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:56 | 2731302 Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

Uh, should energy costs be in that survey of blame?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:33 | 2731444 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Symptom. I'll take currency debasement for the win, Alex.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:41 | 2731465 Precious
Precious's picture

Payback for decades of unsolicited sex.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:24 | 2731912 smiler03
smiler03's picture

No data on lesbians and gay men?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:51 | 2731995 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

in a population pyramid scheme, money flows to the top.



Fri, 08/24/2012 - 01:48 | 2732779 boiltherich
boiltherich's picture

Native born = at the very least a phoney birth certificate

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:39 | 2731463 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Born in America = Native American. QED. Screw the PC definitions.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:03 | 2731842 cherokeepilot
cherokeepilot's picture

Born in America, part Native American (Cherokee) does that make me a Double Native American?


There is a hazard to being part injun, I went to a bar last night. After a few hours of drinking fire water, met good looking Cherokee lady with great body, invited her home.  Woke up to find that she had shape-shifted into large ugly woman.  Have to find medicine man to repair my eyes.

Fri, 08/24/2012 - 02:29 | 2732812 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

"Have to find medicine man"  Whoever sold you that first few hours of fire-water ought to suffice again.

Fri, 08/24/2012 - 06:04 | 2732952 mobtown
mobtown's picture

Should've never bought that second tee-pee during the housing boom. You're problem is you're two tents.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 17:31 | 2731756 chogopogo
chogopogo's picture

How nice, the native Americans are called "Indians", the native Australians are called "Aborigens", I guess that makes the genocide easier to process. 

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:06 | 2731850 cherokeepilot
cherokeepilot's picture

"native Americans are called "Indians".  Wrong, we prefer to be called "injuns", that seperates us from those born in India.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:53 | 2732000 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

feather indians being replaced with dot indians.

white men don't want farmland, white men want facebook

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:34 | 2731216 Unprepared
Unprepared's picture

Damn, I've got none of those categories right.


Can I try again, please?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:51 | 2731291 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

That sex change thing never quite works as advertised, but I hear Hillary has signed up for an addadicktome.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:20 | 2731405 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Go to your local plastic surgery clinic and tell them you want the "Michael Jackson".






Too soon?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 20:39 | 2732225 Moe Howard
Moe Howard's picture

Too late.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 21:50 | 2732414 Slightly Insane
Slightly Insane's picture

I would love to see which groups voted for Obama, and which groups voted for McCain.  I have my suspicions.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:26 | 2731175 iDealMeat
iDealMeat's picture

Bitches,  bitchez..

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:27 | 2731176 strongband
strongband's picture

bending stress diagram, bitchez

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:28 | 2731186 Bam_Man
Bam_Man's picture

Especially good for White Widows Over 65 whose husbands carried large life insurance policies.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:34 | 2731217 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture


Dori Doreau from Sledgehammer made out like a bandit from her divorce. Amazing bit of luck for a limited talent actress.


Martin's divorce settlement from Michael Crichton was 31 million dollars, all tax-free. She was also awarded various fine art including the Roy Lichtenstein sculpture "Day and Night", the Rene Magritte painting "L'Usage de la Parole", the Claes Oldenburd lithograph "Twirling Fork And Meatball" and the Robert Rauschenberg painting "Nest Egg" as well as a Jasper Johns monoprint and a lithograph.

As part of her divorce settlement, Martin also got seventeen horses located in New York, Hawaii, California, Germany and Iceland, as well as one pony owned by their daughter Taylor.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:40 | 2731246 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

Anyone who had to be married to that asshole deserves every penny.

Good writer, wretched person.

Fri, 08/24/2012 - 02:32 | 2732815 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

It's irresponsible bureaucracy that marriage licences can be issued without pre-nups.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:35 | 2731218 LeisureSmith
LeisureSmith's picture

The Dutch are serial killers of white widdows, they just cut them down and hang them up to dry. Sick bastards.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:46 | 2731274 Abiotic Oil
Abiotic Oil's picture

I hear they do that to Big Bud and AK47 too?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:30 | 2731194 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Seperated and divorced, I recall reading that after a marriage falls apart women lose something like 50% of their income.


Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:37 | 2731229 JohnG
JohnG's picture

Not in my case.  Bitch got 50% of mine for 6 years even though I kept the kid.  That's over now, but I'm still bitter....can you tell?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:07 | 2731345 Seer
Seer's picture

Bad attorney! :-(

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:12 | 2731364 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

There are good ones? 

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:25 | 2731421 chistletoe
chistletoe's picture



but if you find you have a bad one, you have to fire him and hire a real bastard.

Last time I got divorced, my ex- wife ended up paying me double my original request.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:50 | 2731499 pazmaker
pazmaker's picture

Last time I got divorced


Wow you say that like you do it all the time!   hahaha

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:51 | 2731500 STP
STP's picture

"Last time I got divorced..."   LOL!  But who am I to laugh, I just dropped off a check to pay for Divorce #3!

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:44 | 2731480 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

That door does swing in both directions. It's how well ur atty knows the judge & how much he pays him. No different than all of our branches of gummint.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 16:09 | 2731541 10mm
10mm's picture

Marriage turned into a contract,a deal.Thats what it is,nothing more nothing less.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:38 | 2731954 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

First and foremost it is and has always been a financial arrangement.  Up until fairly recent times, marriages were arranged by the respective families with an eye to forging alliances and acquiring property.  Girls, in particular, had little say in the matter.  In some parts of the world, that is still the case.  Apparently, arranged marriages work out as well as love matches.  

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 16:57 | 2731671 AGuy
AGuy's picture

Let me guess... And she had an affair with someone with no job or makes next to nothing?

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:09 | 2731856 cherokeepilot
cherokeepilot's picture

Bitch got 50% of mine for 6 years


Mine got over 50% for 10 years,  worth every fucking penny.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:47 | 2731277 NRGIsFree
NRGIsFree's picture

That was 50% of weight.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:30 | 2731195 CommunityStandard
CommunityStandard's picture

I blame old people.  Though when the crash comes, you'll be the first to go.  Karma's a bitch.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:37 | 2731228 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture


Dude, when the crash comes all those zero body fat assholes will be the first to go. They have no fat reserves to fall back on. Their bodies will start breaking down muscle making them weak, tired, then dead.

On the positive side it will be like living in white people India.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:00 | 2731838 Sabibaby
Sabibaby's picture

Keep dreaming.... At least you're making the fatty's feel good about themself spouting nonsense like that!

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:38 | 2731237 economics9698
economics9698's picture

That's not cool.  In Germany in the 20s the old farts starved to death.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 15:18 | 2731391 CommunityStandard
CommunityStandard's picture

They didn't have to send their kids off to try and take over France the decade before.  They didn't have to put their print-happy government in power.  You reap what you sow, and our turn is next.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 18:13 | 2731866 cherokeepilot
cherokeepilot's picture

Karma is a bitch,  may you never get "old".  Perhaps you don't remember, some one of those "old " people raised you, asshole.

Thu, 08/23/2012 - 14:30 | 2731196 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

So I should be looking for an old, white suger mama?


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