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Your Taxpayer Dollars At Work

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Not like anyone would expect anything more, technically, less, but it is always gratifying to know there is someone, somewhere willing to fight for the little guy. And lose.

  • SEC LOSES LAWSUIT AGAINST EX-CITIGROUP OFFICIAL STOKER - BBG
  • SEC SUED CITIGROUP'S BRIAN STOKER OVER CDO REPRESENTATIONS - BBG

Now if only if the SEC's budget was a few cool billion more they would not be losing cases left and right. In fact, they would be able to prevent mass fraud, and even be able to shut down the rigged casino known as the stock market preemptively. With a few hundred million left to pay that Bang Bros invoice too.

 

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Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:34 | 2666104 GMan_
GMan_'s picture

well, it's expensive to buy the 10-Disc collection of Debbie Does Dallas. The SEC has to prioritize its budget accordingly. Whoever wins, we ALL LOSE.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:41 | 2666131 ACP
ACP's picture

Too bad these porn sites weren't going IPO...

You estimate their revenues by simply looking at the SEC's budget.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:48 | 2666156 dwdollar
dwdollar's picture

Maybe the Porn Industry can lobby Congress to expand the SEC.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:53 | 2666161 Born Patriot
Born Patriot's picture

LISTEN KIDS: these conspiracy theories just have to stop. Patriots across America need to unite and agree to move this country forwards, not backwards, and conspiracy freaks give patriots a bad name. Now, I know what it's like to believe in conspiracy theories. I also used to believe that there was "corruption" in our government and "secret deals" with "special interests", but you know what? I got tired. I got tired of believing that crap day in and day out. There’s a big wide world out there and you can't just spend all your time worrying about this nonsense. It's time for many ZHers to grow up.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:56 | 2666183 john39
john39's picture

MDB, is that you?

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:42 | 2666378 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

More like... born to steal other peoples acts.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 19:29 | 2666819 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

Fuck me. i was thinking the same exact thing.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:01 | 2666206 55 men
55 men's picture

More like.... Born Dumbass

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:01 | 2666208 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

more like...born programmed...

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:02 | 2666214 EmmittFitzhume
EmmittFitzhume's picture

You're no Patriot. However I do believe you are some sort of insider

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:26 | 2666317 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel

                     Dr. Samuel Johnson

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:27 | 2666323 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

If it's not MDB, it's definitely someone channeling him. Nice troll.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:39 | 2666369 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

always wondered how the serfs felt about the nobles and rich bishops the kings tax collectors and such..well I am getting a very good idea. tax units feed the machine.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:35 | 2666350 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Free Corzine!

Wed, 08/01/2012 - 01:22 | 2667730 Ungaro
Ungaro's picture

Dear Born Troll,

Please label your posts as "This has been a paid political announcement" to avoid any confusion about it having any base in reality.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:52 | 2666168 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

I think there is more money in new keyboards and mice.  The old ones get sticky and crusty so fast. 

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:19 | 2666476 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

I need a two car funeral organized, who should i go with??

CME?

CFTC?

SEC?

FED?

Treasury?

Obama?

Romney?

Will also require documentation of a successful two car funeral orginization prior to this request.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:35 | 2666105 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

They spend way to much on online porn it seems.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:27 | 2666501 Lohn Jocke
Lohn Jocke's picture

I don't suppose I could ask for a bailout for my bang bros. bill...?

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:38 | 2666112 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

The SEC could take up a collection from the porn industry to offset their legal expenses...

Edit: LOL ~ What's the 'over/under' on how long before when you do a GOOGLE SEARCH on 'SEC', porn sites start filling up the cue?...

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:36 | 2666113 yogibear
yogibear's picture

LOL, the SEC always reverts what's it's best at, watching porn and comparing notes on XXX websites.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:38 | 2666121 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

SEC shouldn't do "lawsuits".

THEY are the regulating body. THEY DECIDE on guilt or innocence.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 19:32 | 2666833 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

Yeah, right? I thought it was the AG's job to prosecute.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:41 | 2666122 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

SEC no doubt was instructed behind the scenes how to lose the lawsuit so that the appearance of "rule of law" could be maintained.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:06 | 2666443 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

ebworthen accurately discerned:

SEC no doubt was instructed behind the scenes how to lose the lawsuit so that the appearance of "rule of law" could be maintained.

Expect those at the SEC involved with this case soon to be "seeking new challenges," and coincidentally finding those challenges in highly paid positions at CITI.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:11 | 2666457 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Or they will work for China... That fantasy for another.

There was no conviction because there should be no conviction under US citizen law.

No US citizen has even been punished for behaving the US citizen way. As long as they are human beings.

It is quite sure that non human beings or sub human beings were punished for behaving the US citizen way.

For behaving the US citizen way is a gift reserved to human beings.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 21:52 | 2667194 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

All those words to say nothing.

Chinese schizophrenicitizenism at work.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 23:41 | 2667521 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

You have a point.

We propose an ideal and then ignore it.

Prosecute and jail the assholes whatever law man or woman (or military member choosing to defend the Constitution and We The People) that still cares or this ChiComm is right.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:38 | 2666123 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Well, at least they pretended to try. More than can be said for the scumbag CFTC

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:38 | 2666124 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

Maybe if we put Jon Corzine in a porn........

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:09 | 2666450 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

.

Maybe if we put Jon Corzine in a porn........

For Corzine, it would have to be one of those Scheiss pornos out of Germany.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:43 | 2666125 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

Well if they enforce negligently to the benefit of the "regulated" how well do you expect them to prosecute?

In other news:

The Securities and Exchange Commission's long-awaited report on the municipal market asks Congress to give it authority to set disclosure standards for muni issuers and to provide the tools to enforce those standards.

Oh boy! SEC to the rescue!  Why don't they investigate all the WMD interest rate swaps rigged GICS and other IEDs the Street has buried througout the muni landscape over the past 10 or 15 years?

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:40 | 2666135 pods
pods's picture

You really cannot make this shit up.  They cannot nail a bankster on CDOs?

So does this mean the LIEbor scandal will not result in any prosecutions?

Fractional reserve MBS securitization?

Re-re-re-rehypothecation of everyone's soon to be in the account of JPM pension funds?

About time to start reserving light poles.............

pods

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:44 | 2666148 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

A cynic might imagine they were less then fully committed to winning.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:57 | 2666187 john39
john39's picture

that and the legal system is constructed to favor big corporations and banks anyway...  like our "democratic" system, it gives the illusion of fairness...

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:50 | 2666388 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

Yes..., well, apparently it's all been an illusion.

My first marriage was constructed much the same way.... it really wasn't may beautiful house...,

and it really wasn't my beautiful wife.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1wg1DNHbNU

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 19:56 | 2666903 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"A cynic might imagine they were less then fully committed to winning."

That was my first thought...probably had their latest grad student as the lead on it. I can hear it now...Go git em Tiger...smirk.

Well, at least he's "giving something back" for those student loans ;-)

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:48 | 2666158 malikai
malikai's picture

Future growth industries:

Guillotine manufacturing

Guillotine operations

Rope manufacturers

Lamp post manufacturing

Noose training workshops

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:06 | 2666232 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

optimist!

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:42 | 2666141 Atlantis Consigliore
Atlantis Consigliore's picture

Debby Does Dallas:  SEC does CFTC ....which one is the Dom and which one is the Sub?  sorry Switch?....

Spare Change....FRAUD MARKETS, ALL you can believe in....

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:43 | 2666144 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

that rock, scissors, paper trial battle thing doesn't seem to do much justice to.... justice.... maybe they should try something new?

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:43 | 2666145 Haager
Haager's picture

Its a catch 22

Using taxpayers money to afford lawyers is taxpayers fraud, especially when they are losing the case.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:47 | 2666154 Hype Alert
Hype Alert's picture

There is no stock market anymore.  It should be renamed the FED addict market and mark the beginning as March 2009

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:07 | 2666240 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Don't tell that to the 'Elliott Wavers'...

They're all still trying to learn their ABC's...

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 20:43 | 2667035 OldE_Ant
OldE_Ant's picture

Peel back the paper that says Market and you'll see word CASINO in bold flashing lights.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:47 | 2666155 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Another name for the yeah we got your number sucka list...

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 15:54 | 2666178 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Regulators, let's ride!

[like ass-chapped tranny midgets on E and painkillers]

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:07 | 2666239 Getting Old Sucks
Getting Old Sucks's picture

Perhaps the SEC only puts on a show because the banks have the goods on the SEC and will spill the beans if they don't throw the case?  That's the way I believe our entire government works.  I hear about how new congressmen and senators have to go thru indoctrination when they first get to DC.  I can only imagine that it just consist of a lobbyist offering a bribe that he/she must accept so they are as guilty as everyone else. 

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:13 | 2666259 q99x2
q99x2's picture

We will soon have our chance to vote for hope and change.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:52 | 2666408 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

hope or change

 

-fixed it for ya

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 19:14 | 2666768 logicalman
logicalman's picture

No Hope

No Change

Fixed it for ya!

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:15 | 2666281 Meesohaawnee
Meesohaawnee's picture

or the Fed Price propaganda mechanism

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:19 | 2666292 Shock and Aweful
Shock and Aweful's picture

It's just too hard to prosecute and CONVICT white collar crime.

And, when they do manage to get a conviction, what happens?

It gets appealed for 10 years...and then, after everyone has forgotten about it, the judge is paid off and it gets thrown out...or something.

And, in the oft chance that the conviction sitcks....they get a small (in relative size to what they stole) fine and maybe (in the most egregious cases) a federal prison sentence of 1-5 years

I say we take the Iranian approach....I was reading a story the other day about a couple people who were convicted in Iran of banking fraud...and the fuckers were (or soon will be) executed! 

I tell you this....some CNN footage of Jaime Dimon having his fucking head chopped off because he is a fucking thief would put an immediate end to about 90% of the wall-street corruption / market rigging in this country. 

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 21:04 | 2667095 OldE_Ant
OldE_Ant's picture

Yeah and the bonus is that TV ratings would SKYROCKET.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:40 | 2666364 haskelslocal
haskelslocal's picture

How is it us Government employees keep demonstrating our lack of necessity? How is it that people say we're not needed, and then we continuously prove are worthlessness?

If only I could be a Rudy Baylor in The Rainmaker. If only I could make a difference!

If only my boss would quit overriding my strategy.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 16:41 | 2666375 IMA5U
IMA5U's picture

Brian must be Stoked That d00d should go out light up RICK's

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:08 | 2666445 Widowmaker
Widowmaker's picture

So, Shit Romney hasn't paid a dime in taxes in over 10 years and those that actually do foot the bill get no justice.

There is all the incentive in the world to protest via witholding taxes in 2012.

One thing is certain, Shit-Mitt will never be president -  even Republifags hate his blood sucking elitist guts.

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 17:17 | 2666472 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

Perhaps midget porn was the wrong place to look for evidence of wrongdoing for this particular case?

just a thought....

Tue, 07/31/2012 - 19:49 | 2666886 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Our heroes.

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