"Twas the days before Christmas, and all across the street, not a human was trading..." but, as tradition demands, UBS' venerable director floor operations - Art Cashin - unleashes his annual poem. Summing up the year in amazing alliteration, Cashin takes on Bitcoins, The Fed, the Volcker Rule, and... Anthony Weiner.
Via Art Cashin,
A TRADITIONAL PRESENTATION
‘Tis two days before Christmas
and at each brokerage house
The only thing stirring
was the click of a mouse
Down on the Exchange
the tape inches along
Brokers bargained and traded
as they hummed an old song
The Fed kept on printing
yet few jobs did appear
But it's time to move on
so they'll taper next year
Boston won the World Series
Baltimore took the Bowl
But Tiger still struggles
to get the ball in the hole
From Bitcoins to Binge-viewing
brand new things did occur
And the Prez took a selfie
that caused quite a stir
There was a government shutdown
most folks called it a sham
And to slow down the Senate
a guy read "Green Eggs and Ham"
In Cleveland three women
finally freed of their fears
Held captive by a mad man
for nearly ten years
The Pope said he resigned
an occurrence quite rare
A new Pope named Francis
new sits in that chair
Back tried Spitzer and Weiner
they brought little to cheer
But it’s Christmastime, Alice
and Santa is near
So stop looking backwards
have a cup of good cheer
And kiss you a loved one
raise your hopes for next year
And amidst all the trading
Christmas themes we will heed
And share our good fortune
with families in need
And tomorrow they’ll pause
as we wait on the bell
To sing a tradition
a song for old “Nell”
Don’t let this year’s problems
impede Christmas Cheer
Resolve to be happy
throughout the New Year
And resist ye Grinch feelings
let joy never stop
Put the bad at the bottom
keep the good on the top
So count up your blessings
along with your worth
You’re still living here
in the best place on earth
And think ye of wonders
that light children's eyes
And hope Santa will bring you
that Christmas surprise
So play ye a carol
by Mario Lanza
Unless you are waiting
to celebrate Kwanzaa
Hanukkah’s over
And Ramadan’s gone
Different folks, different holidays
yet each spirit lives on
Whatever your feast is
we hope you all still
Find yourself just surrounded
by folks of goodwill
Tuesday, as the bell rings
hark to your heart’s call
And as Santa would shout
Merry Christmas to All!