Tech Giant Cisco Craters Following Horrifying Guidance

On the surface, CSCO's numbers were not terrible: the company only missed its revenue expectation which is fine: after all nobody cares about revenues anymore and the only thing that matters are adjusted, recasted, pro-forma, non-GAAP, made up EPS numbers excluding virtually all COGS, R&D and SG&A items. Just for kicks, CSCO also threw in that last refuge of a company with no growth prospects: yet another massive $15 billion stock buyback. However, in light of the ongoing idiotic hopium that a recovery is just around the corner, as has been the case for the past 5 years always to no avail, what is cratering the company in after hours trading, was its forecast for the next quarter. It was a doozy:

  • Q2 EPS was expected to be $0.52. Instead the company lowered the outlook to a range of $0.45-$0.47.

But the punchline... wait for it:

  • Q2 revenues was expected up 4%. Instead it will be... drumroll... -8 to -10%!

Yup: the company expected an up to a 10% drop in revenues. Welcome to Mr. Yellen's recovery.

Because who really needs the internet... Oh yeah, with the social media bubble in full force, apparently insolvent retailers do: after all FB, TWTR, LNKD et al are all trading based on the assumption that advertising budgets are getting infinite-er by the day.

Curiously, the stock is trading after hours as if the vacuum tubes algos don't know that fundamentals haven't mattered in ages, and all CSCO has to do is boost its 2022 multiple by another 5-6 turns to get back to even.