Futures Soar Back To Green, Dax Over 9000 On Russian Tweet Putin Ready To De-escalate

Wonder why moments ago futures soared and wiped out all overnight losses of nearly 15 points, pushing into the green, the DAX surging back over 9000 and the USDJPY right back to its cozy tractor-beam manipulated level of 102.000, just as the NY Fed's Kevin Henry walked through the door? The culprit: the following two tweets (yes, really) which were caught by Bloomberg and the other newswires and blasted as a done deal.

This news was enough for the algos (who lack a sarcasm filter) to assume that, just like yesterday when a same story was floated only to be roundly rejected in hours, all is again fixed. Needless to say, believing that Putin will back off at this point is a pipe dream only a momentum-igniting vacuum tube can harbor.

Of course, by the time Russia rejects any hopes of de-escalation, the catalyst for the ramp will be forgotten and stocks will close green ahead of the weekend, just as the Princeton central-planners demanded. And making sure Russia has zero intentions of de-escalating, is the latest counter-escalation by Ukraine itself:

  • KIEV GOVERNMENT ALSO ASKING NATIONAL DEFENCE AND SECURITY COUNCIL TO TAKE SANCTIONS AGAINST 65 RUSSIAN COMPANIES "WHICH ALSO FINANCE TERRORISM"-YATSENIUK

And of course, this which hardly had Merkel's blessing:

One can just see Putin "backing off" after being verbally and sanctionally slapped by Ukraine...

And here is the ridiculous move in its full glory, even as the world - the real world, not that of headlines and algos - descends into global trade and real war.