My name is Squilliam Fancyson III but my bought and paid for pals call me Squiddy. I am a well-to-do octopus. They say I am pretty stuck up but I own a balloon/casino, a private yacht, an island, a lake, a hooker, and so much more.
My lush home, Squiddesdon Manor in BikiniBottomshire has 12 floors. A whirlpool bath elevator, a golden toilet, a jewel-encrusted toilet paper rack, and a guilded doorknob. It also has a rooftop garden, a pink soda waterfall, and a 24-foot long statue of my unibrow. There are pictures of me all around the house. Great parts of my mansion are made out of marble. It was once on "House Fancy".
At high school we had an eyebrow growing contest in the 9th grade where I beat my rival Squidward by a hair. But as you can guess that was long before 911!